“My Mom Got Shot In The Head” – Trevor Noah – (It’s My Culture)


And it was a Sunday morning I was in bed still asleep, it was
early in the morning maybe like 9 or 10 o’clock. and the phone rings and it’s my baby brother
using my mom’s phone his name is Isaac, he’s 9 years old so I answer the phone like, hello? “Hello, Trevor?” I said, hey Isaac what do you want? “How are you?” I am fine thanks. “I am also fine, thank you.” I am fine thanks and how are you Isaac? “I am fine thanks and how are you? I am fine thank you. “It’s a pleasure.” “Oh, and Trevor are you busy?” yes sort of, why? “No, because mom’s been shot.” I am sorry, what? “Yeah, mom has been shot and we are
at the hospital. Can you come?” Mom’s been shot, okay,
what do you mean? Okay of course I can
come, which hospital? and he tells me the hospital. can you come? Like he is to polite for his own good can you come? Like I am going to have to
slot mom into my schedule “Oh, coffee at two and then, eish! PlayStation at one,
okay mom we will try… Come on, can I come? of course I can come, I am panicking. I jump out of bed, I am running around I am trying to put my clothes on, some things are backwards I don’t even notice, I don’t even care I grab the car keys but I
am looking for the car keys I am busy running around
there, losing my mind I jump into the car, into the streets as soon as I am out the gate,
the tears start coming out You cant even control it, you are
just driving and all of the sudden (Crying) I am driving, I am trying to hold it back but then I get to the
traffic light and the robot is red and I let it out, it just comes out (crying) NO don’t wash my window! No, no, don’t, don’t! Hey, no, no, hey, no, no! Hey, no. (crying) there I am, driving to the
hospital like a mad man I get there, jump out the car my brother is standing there
at the emergency section I see him outside, he is just standing
like nothing happened, looking around I am like, Isaac what happened? He’s like, “Mom got shot, she’s inside” I am like, are you okay? He’s like, “mom was shot, not me.” No, that’s not what I am saying you idiot whatever, I am coming back So I run inside My mom is in the prep area, all the
doctors are standing around her there is blood everywhere,
I am looking at the doctors and just by the way doctors are not as good looking
as they are on those T.V shows No, like they set the bar really high I was shocked because
I ran in and was like what the hell (Confused) Sorry, that was inappropriate,
what’s happening here guys? “Sir, you need to leave” I said I was sorry, what’s happening? No sir, you cant be
here please leave. I am like whatever, okay. So I go outside, the nurse
come to me and she is like “Mr. Noah?”
I said yes. “Okay Mr. Noah, we have your
wife stabilized right now and” I said, my wife? She said yes, that’s Mrs. Noah right? Yes, that’s my mom. Oh, I am sorry thought she was Come on, why would you think she is my wife? You think I would, she
is cool but I mean like have you seen the girls oh, I will show you the pictures
afterward. What’s going on? She’s like, “Okay Mr. Noah your mom has just been stabilized and we are
gonna have to start thinking about surgery She has been shot in the head and she
has been shot in the lower buttox region so this is a very serious thing. I am like, yes it is
so what’s happening? “Well, we just found out that
she doesn’t have medical aid. I said, what? She goes, yeah she
doesn’t have medical aid. Now my mom always had
medical aid, always but now it turns out she canceled it a few years ago I didn’t know this, she canceled it because she never gets sick. you know those people? I never get sick, I
never get sick Trevor I never get sick, I don’t know why
I have this. I never get sick Yes, but you didn’t think of bullets. Now she is in the hospital, no medical aid So I said to the nurse, what does this mean? She says well it means we are going to
have to put her back in the ambulance and send her to a public hospital. I said, but she is bleeding
now, you cant send her She said, ” I am sorry sir but that is all
we can do, she has to go to public hospital” Now I am panicking, a public hospital? Normally a good place to go, normally but now what’s happening is
just mis-administation of funds money is going missing, you
don’t know what’s happening they don’t have the right equipment now I am picturing guys
trying to fix my mom There’s the doctor, “give me a scalpel” “We got a spanner” “Yeah, bring it. At least it’s a shifting okay, lets try something.” I am stressed. so I said, well what do we
do without medical aid? She says, “well, nothing sir.” I said well what if I
give you the money? She says, “well, you don’t know
how much it will cost sir you cant unless you give us your card
and then we just work from there I said well take my card,
here’s my credit card. She goes, “Sir, it can
get very expensive” I said, this is my mom this is my mom, you use the money.
Go! She goes, don’t tell me it’s expensive this is my mother we are
talking about, you know? I realized through this I
have neglected my brother he’s been standing there the
whole time with these big eyes So I am like hey Isaac,
hey Isaac what’s on your mind man you okay big boy? His like, “Trevor?” Yes? “can I come to your house and
play PlayStation later today?” How can you ask me about PlayStation,
your mom has just been shot you cant be asking me about that, whats
wrong with you you stupid child! You know what, you are never going
to play PlayStation again, ever no PlayStation for you ever in your life, ever Go away, go sit down and think about what you just said! PlayStation, how the hell is he
going to ask me about PlayStation the nurse comes back and
she goes, “Okay Mr. Noah we just used R900 for some blood tests.” I am like okay, why are
you telling me this? It’s R900, this is my mom.
Use the money, go! She goes away. R900, how
you gonna talk about that? She comes back and says, ” Mr. Noah
we need R2000 for some x-rays” This is my mom, not a pair of jeans use the money, go! She goes away, I am like
my mom is going to die busy asking me questions over here My mom is gonna die,
my mom’s gonna die that’s all I am saying, and I
say it and my brother hears me He starts crying. (crying) I am like, Isaac I am sorry. I am sorry, are you okay? He says, “I am not okay” “you said I am never going to play
PlayStation ever in my life! now I cant play Need for Speed
and cant play PlayStation” I am like, you still crying about PlayStation? you have no right to cry, you hear me! Shut up, stop crying! You cant cry about this,
you shut up! Now a woman comes out, she
knows my mom has been shot now she thinks I am telling my
brother not to cry about my mom She just gets involved, she is like “Hey, you let him cry okay! you let him cry, some people
express their pain in different ways you let him cry!” I am like I will not let him cry
lady, I will not let him cry many kids grow up without one, okay this is not, it’s fine like, he should go play
in the park or something it’s not the time to cry
right now, what the hell you spoil your kids,
that’s your problem you take it away from them so
they can learn about life! You and you, you both shut up!
All of you, shut up! I am telling them this,
the nurse comes back She goes, “Mr Noah, we
are ready for surgery.” I am like, so do the surgery. She says, “yes but sir,
this can get very expensive ICU and surgery is very expensive” I am like, Lady what is expensive?
This is my mother. She says, “anywhere from like R20 000” I am like, R20 000?
This is my mom. “all the way to like R500 000.” Yo, but she has lived hey? I mean I mean she is like what 57, 57? it’s almost finished, you know? even she says she is old, I mean.
You know? You said the bullet is in the head,
I mean the head, it’s finished. yo, because with that money we
need to pay for the funeral we need to buy scones for everybody this guy needs a
PlayStation, you know so I don’t know if she says, “Sir we need the go ahead
otherwise we cant do anything” I said okay, well use the card.
Just use the card we will handle the debt She goes away, I am stressed because I have seen this happen to people go into hospital, don’t
have enough money use your credit card and the next
thing you are in debt for years and the person could die the person dies and when they die the doctor doesn’t give
you your money back No, no he doesn’t because he tried and
that is all he has to do you will get there and be
like, Doctor did you win? He would be like
(Ironic sound) and your money is gone that is all I was stressed about but the most amazing thing happened turns out my mother was not that badly hurt. it was a miracle really the ass bullets didn’t do much damage because my family is gifted. the head bullet didn’t hit anything vital other than the head, obviously but it missed her spinal cord missed the nerves,
didn’t touch the brain went right through, missed the eye hit the eye socket and deflected and all it did was cut a
piece of her nostril off just one side and the bullet went out clean. which meant she didn’t have to
go in for intensive surgery and her recovery was only a week. Yeah, a week.
Which was fantastic because that means the bill was only R24 000. and she is alive, yes
but the bill was only R24 000 this was great, really great because R25 000 was my cut-off So You laugh but that is how much I
calculated I am willing to pay my mom back for all the Ultramel custard
I have consumed in my life. everything else, none of my business food, clothes, schooling, all
of that stuff I am not paying I hate it when the parents
say that to they’re kids “You know how hard I have to work
for your bloody school and clothes” “No, no, no! I didn’t ask to be born,
that’s your job. Please, you handle that I asked for the Ultramel,
we can keep a tab don’t involve me in your things.” and that is what I calculated, R25 000. I would have been there, R24 750 I would have been
there by the doctor Hey Doc, it’s fine my man.
No stop. no, you tried you tried, it’s cool no you tried, just switch
off there, switch off How much, 250 left? we will pop a draw, just
switch off there, it’s fine you tried. it was fantastic I told my mom about
the 25, she laughed she didn’t know I was serious. and to show you what a
crazy family we have my mom is in the recovery ward she has got these tubes
in her and everything and an I.V and my brother is in the
corner, bored out of his mind and my grandmother is in the
other corner reading the bible and I am holding my mom’s
hand and I am crying still crying, this is a week later.
I am still crying (crying) I have been crying the whole week but I have also been using this time
to cry for other things in my life. No, because as a man you
need to know when to cry you loop it all together and you
just cry one time, it’s like like we cry in bulk,
you got to understand You don’t just cry, one, one, one, no cry in bulk. so I am crying for everything (crying) and my mom looks at me and she goes “Shh Trevor, don’t
cry my baby” I said no mom I got to cry,
you where shot in the head. She says no, look on the bright side I said, what bright side? She said, at least now
because of my nose you are officially the best
looking person in the family. I was like, by default.
(crying)

100 Responses

  1. Trevor Noah says:

    Thanks for watching! 🙌🏾Subscribe & turn on notifications to find out when I upload new videos! http://bit.ly/SubscribeTrevorNoah

  2. Maidon Chiliwede says:

    Thr bullets part and the playstation part were the best, everything was amazing

  3. fadwa farag says:

    I luv you so much

  4. Maryooma says:

    The quality at the end was bad kinda

  5. Mo Luv says:

    That sounds like my mom thinking bout her children before herself rip mom

  6. Mo Luv says:

    Lol u funny 😂😂😂

  7. Djhann Andaya Music says:

    What’s Expensive, That’s My Mother🤣

  8. Catherine Wanjiru says:

    You'd have to read the book to understand how much humor has been applied here.

  9. Iby ghee says:

    This is why America needs a system like the NHS.

  10. Angel Vergara says:

    will i go to hell for laughing at the part where he said “well u didn’t think of bullets”

  11. The Best There Is says:

    Your mother is a walking miracle Trevor, all because of the grace of God, glory be to God…

  12. him sam says:

    I don't know if this is funny. All i can think is my mom. I can't imagine my mom being so sick, and i make it funny. I'm so sad.

  13. kate lol says:

    3:34 I wanna laugh but it's too sad ahhaah

  14. Chiemeka Nwogu says:

    This guy has 3 accent one is African

  15. Chloe xoxo says:

    His little brother tho 😂

  16. Pretty Sandhu says:

    This story was from a book

  17. Selman Yüzay says:

    His fkn net worth is 13 million lol

  18. RyZeツ lol says:

    This Guy Accent Make It 10x Funnier

  19. Tshepo Tikky says:

    Cry in bulk 😁😁😁😁

  20. Izacki Mwaki says:

    Men, we cry in bulk 😂😂😂lol!!

  21. Harambe05 Your boi says:

    How did she get shot in the first place

  22. Âu revoir â Zed says:

    of cource they are laughing they pay dudeee

  23. JoshuaF Rojas says:

    This guy is great honestly

  24. BikeLife Belitong says:

    "bullets" hahahaha

  25. Ian Vue says:

    ᔕOᗷᔕ Iᑎ ᒪᗩᑌGᕼTEᖇ

  26. Lean Mean Green Bean Machine says:

    Wow I really like you more when you’re making jokes instead of pretending to be a Battlefield fan

  27. Jason TOC says:

    Healthcare shouldn’t have a price tag😤

  28. Sagar Wadhwani says:

    Thats the most American thing ever.

  29. Angela Joel says:

    I like the way he said bullets!!!
    I'm 13,from Namibia, I love this guy.

  30. The iPhone Director says:

    5:11 did he mean 9 grand?

  31. Leila Nuryan says:

    Comedy is medicine for a damaged soul.

  32. Josephine Odigbo says:

    Sobbing No don't wash my window! continues sobbing

  33. Josephine Odigbo says:

    I died the first time i watched this and the 2nd and the 3rd and the 100th time

  34. Josephine Odigbo says:

    Is it just me that's wondering why Trevor has a PlayStation in his house I'm just imagining him playing fortnite.

  35. suliatube2010 says:

    This is my first tube for you & now I am addicted to you well done Trevor

  36. shukriya hussain says:

    O my God , I thought how traumatic he might feel due to the shot after I read the video but all fun haha love it

  37. Mr Gold says:

    How she die thoo

  38. dancantazeher D says:

    MORE ARAB JOKES. WILL DEFINITELY MAKE YOUR DAY!!! CLICK HERE FOR A LAUGH >>> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjADEOpBROI

  39. wong joman says:

    Who shot her?😢

  40. mariama faal says:

    Cry in Bulk, ohhhh i know that feeling.

  41. Awakened citizen says:

    Douche…

  42. Noah Hall says:

    Wow how the hell is this comedy happened to my cousin he was killed by a stray bullit by hunter died in my arms waiting on ambulance

  43. Varissa Varissa says:

    Dr. Quawn Quawn .. ur money gone 🤣

  44. RapTzZ Stamatescu says:

    Stupid

  45. Dante' says:

    Sad and funny at the same time.

  46. Gugulethu Vilakazi says:

    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  47. Rohan Gupta says:

    900 grand for blood tests!!

    I am from India and that's a crime

  48. Dang Duong Nguyen says:

    USA hospitals are so shit. Singapore’s Hospitals are much better and cheaper. Idk why people think that USA is the best country when their are much better ones like Singapore.

  49. Moj I says:

    Where did he even get the money for this even though it’s fake

  50. Boby Singh says:

    The thumbnail was like *Goalcast*

  51. Saruman The White says:

    Although I did not laugh out loud like I do when watching Steve Harvey or Bernie Mac, I’m thoroughly and deliciously entertained by Trevor Noah’s clean and smart humour.

  52. Mayibongwe_ R says:

    When I read this part in his book, Born A Crime I had tears in my eyes…
    Then I rock up here and he's relating the incident in such a hilarious manner… only Trevor

  53. Hk Gamer says:

    I saw u on Comedy Central

  54. Sandra Elena Contreras M. says:

    hahahahahahahahah craaaaazyy
    cry in bulk! ahahahah

  55. David Mbagu says:

    Just from reading his book, Born a Crime. I was disheartened after reading that part. Fuck you Abel!

  56. Hk Gamer says:

    U started YouTube when it’s was made

  57. Keyo Wilson says:

    It's a miracle story of Trevor's mother surviving a shooting, plus I love how he turned it into comedy. That's a true gift of a comedian.

  58. Nyisha Martin says:

    Hes so annoying. Its not your culture you are not black american.

  59. Nishad S says:

    if Em can rap about his life so does Tervor, he jokes but he loves his mom…

  60. Lubna Abbas says:

    SPOILERS ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 a question to those who red the book (born a crime)……. u who wants to reed it but didn't yet don't reed my comment………

    wasn't Andrew who called Trevor? cuz in the book Izek was with his father Abel and was dropped off at Abel's friend house, right?

  61. super Jenius11 says:

    “I never get sick”
    “Yes, but you know what you didn’t expect…

    BOOOLETTS”

  62. Herbert du Plessis says:

    I always find it amazing that Trevor refuses to acknowledge as to how well things were run before the current regime took over. Yes, he will make fun of palefaces with the insinuating accent, he will talk up those that aren't, but he will never acknowledge that the previous regime administered better, and spent more decisivley than the current one.

  63. Michael molina says:

    Damn a surgery costed him around $1k meanwhile in the US it would’ve been over $100k

  64. Abdiyo Ibrahim says:

    Funny 😆

  65. yeayou zazoo says:

    The thumbs down people must. Support trump🤭

  66. PAWAN SINGH says:

    Who shot?

  67. SVAFnemesis says:

    oh my goodness I had no idea this happened to Trevor. Hope he has completely walked out of this tragedy.

  68. Michonne Twd says:

    The book is great I got sad reading about this.

  69. Michonne Twd says:

    If Abel is still alive to this day I hope he’s a better man.

  70. Deni Filipovic says:

    Sick bastard 'nuff said, that's not funny, sorry. It ist Ur um 😞

  71. Napoleon Bonaparte 🔥 says:

    Jokes on mom na fella not impressed

  72. France Lewis says:

    Thats how i cry too. My grandmother died a couple years ago and i cried 3 years after when something else happened but i cry when i see money thrown away. Glad everything is okay tho and it was a good joke

  73. D. Kras says:

    How was his mom shot

  74. Jonny 616-999-6669 says:

    Lol love Trevor noah he never becomes stale like some American comedians

  75. Debasish Raltepaul says:

    The sheer talent and hardwork you will need to turn your scariest reality into a comedy. ❤️

  76. Shadrack Phinias says:

    😂😂😂 and this guy need the play station #trevah noah we like u from 🇹🇿🇹🇿 tanzania

  77. Akul Joshi says:

    bullets

  78. Big Bulk says:

    The best stand up of our times. I've not seen him repeat his material…true talent.

  79. NCW Productions says:

    3:34
    BULLETS.

  80. Ace 1o7 says:

    She got shot in the head?!! The bullet went through her head! Whaaaaaat?!!

  81. Mike Mckenzie says:

    England accent , African accent SAME DIFFERECE 😒

  82. Swifty Roblox says:

    If you get shot in the head your dead instantly

  83. Tommy laishram says:

    You laire fpck

  84. cancer anus says:

    500,000
    Yo but she lived aye

  85. Terrakinetic says:

    It takes a special comedian to turn a story about your mother getting shot in the head into a comedy routine.

    Oh look, there's Russell Peters in the sidebar, ready to accuse Trevor of stealing his joke of his mother getting shot in the head.

  86. joseph pausanos says:

    Thats why i love you trevor haha

  87. Soni Manderson says:

    You are so funny ,I declare I must meet you

  88. Wairia Animation says:

    It's kinda hard to laugh at this after reading the whole story in his book. Dude turned out alright after all he's been through. Good for him.

  89. fawad malik says:

    My father recently died and i stumbled on this video, Well played YouTube suggestions

  90. SanDee McGeek says:

    even though this was funny, why was your mom shot? what happened?

  91. Giulio Draghi says:

    Mr Noah you are brilliant! Greetings from Rio de Janeiro! Come to entartain us some day. We Brazilians love you!

  92. Ramon Blackz says:

    But why was she shot that's the question or is the answer "it's Africa" that would be messed up lol

  93. Claudine Lawson says:

    I love the ending. A real mom know how to make their child smile in the midst of pain.

  94. Plain Jane says:

    Any one else get to the end of the first video you watched of his & be says to click the subscribe button and your doing it so fast because he's so handsome he's hypnotized you & could literally convince you to rob a bank and your trying to follow his instructions but at the same time not mistakenly exit out of his video!! Yes boo I'll hit subscribe…… I'll do anything you say…… oh huh prizes like from you like you are going to touch something and send it to me???? …….. FUCK U MEAN NO PRIZES THIS A FREE VIDEO!!!!! BOY don't play with my emotions, unsubscribe!!!!!
    Lol SYKE. …. I'm subscribed, I'm not missing NOTHING he posts. (Bet if u want Trevor you can just touch a piece of paper and mail it to me I won't mind, any paper. It could be a blank sheet of paper as long as you touched it…. it's a prize to me!!! Hell it could be your gum wrapper u about to throw away I'll even pay for the envelope & postage)

  95. Raghu Bhat says:

    Somehow.. this is not funny at all…am sorry.. could not laugh..

  96. karichou says:

    ''you are officially the best looking person in the family ……… by default'' loved this part

  97. Sweet toto says:

    Hey like those hot boys from high school who are popular and sporty.

  98. Manuela Rodriguez says:

    Love you Trevor. Doing a great job⭐⭐💋💋👌⭐😆👏👏👏👏

  99. irob rf says:

    This was funny and all but you know whats even funnier watching this on your phone while other people listen from a distance and all they can hear is the crying part . Like I’m literally watching a video of a dude just crying. 😅 giving me the weirdest looks rite now .

  100. Krishna Joshi says:

    How can your mom be shot just like that. those freaks might not have even license.

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